As always, deciding between these things is never easy. But the following two stories stuck in our brains and wouldn't leave. Congrats to Greg Berger and STL_Emily, who each win a pair of tickets to the Beirut show! Please send an email to Chris AT kdhx.org to claim your prize, you two. I'll give you all the details on picking up the tickets.
First up is Greg, who watches a situation go from bad, to worse, to FIRE ANTS, and back to "we can laugh about it now." Insane:
"Remember those gigantor full-size conversion vans that were ever so popular back in the day? Well one night, while on vacation in Gulf Shores with my extended family, we were on our way back from going out to dinner and the van got a flat. My Dad proceeded to get out the standard jack and get the spar on. This was way back in the day, so luckily I wasn't of age to be helping just yet. Apparently there was some trouble in getting the wheel off so my father shimmied under the van to give the tire a push (or something, really have no idea what thought broke through the common sense barrier there). Regardless, he's on his side about a quarter way under the back of the van and the jack fails. So now this full size conversion van lays solely on his shoulder (remember the back right wheel is no longer on the axle). We're all screaming and trying to figure out what to do. In the meantime, we all then realize that he is laying in a pile of fire ants that seem to be pretty pissed that he's there and repeatedly sting/bite the stupid human stuck under the physical manifestation of his ingenuity. Luckily some of my uncles arrived in another car behind us and a cop showed up on the scene as well. My siblings, cousins, and I watched in amazement as the men gathered around and lifted the van off of him.A visit to the hospital showed that nothing was broken, not even the skin. He escaped seemingly unscathed. That was about 15 years ago and he still has an indent on his arm/shoulder from where the van lay. True story."
Next up is Emily, who brings Saint Louis charm to the Old Country, and may actually be banned from The Hill after this. This scene is straight out of a Farrelly Brothers movie, and we can almost see the look on the violin player's face (Or fiddle player, sure. Depends on where you're from, we guess):
"Last March I was in Florence for an Italian Renaissance class. We were seeing the sights, walking the city, soaking up some good Italian culture. So, of course, we ate a lot. My friends and I walked all the way across town to have dinner at a hole-in-the-wall restaurant my professor had recommended. And lo and behold, professor and family are there. We all sit at the same table, look over the menu. My professor passes down his plate and tells us to try his. He had ordered Florentine steak, which is a bloody peppery mess of raw cow muscle that the city is famous for. I guess my friend Ashley was feeling adventurous cause she took a huge bite. Annnnd instantly choked on it! So this nice little family restaurant and fellow diners are watching as we cause a huge commotion; we're all jumping up at the same time to help her, silverware and plates are falling to the floor, and she finally spits the steak out. The fiddle player had stopped his music. First thing out of Ashley's mouth; "THAT SHIT IS DISGUSTING." The waiter gave us our check about 30 seconds later. Did we mortify our teacher, offend 20 Italians at the same time, and still want some Imo's pizza? Yes, yes, and yes."
Thanks again to everyone who entered and, if you didn't win, don't pace around, mutter things and hit yourself in the head over it. We have something really special cooking for our next contest that's just as easy to participate in. And it's a big one. Make sure you keep tabs on us at Facebook and Twitter to hear all about it.
*special props to my intern Mad Matt Hanley for helping us pick the winners! He has an eye for awesome.





